Marijuana Review: Head Cheese by Emerald Evolution Seattle recreational marijuana source

This little doozy has been on my radar for some time, but for an inexplicable reason I never got around to it until now. On the week of March the 7th, I bring you Head Cheese – one of seven winners from the first Seattle recreational cannabis cup (circa 2015).

Head Cheese is produced by Emerald Evolution (also known as E², which is awesome because to hell with mass and speed of light – this is energy squared, that’s it… deal with it). The strain has a very high THC level, which I will detail later in the specifics. A large Tetrahydrocannabinol level comes with a large price, and I picked up Head Cheese for $65 (yikes) for 3.5 grams.

Located in Anacortes, WA – this producer exclusively grows indoor hydro flower. The packaging has negative space in the shape of a diamond that acts like a window to the weed, all the appropriate design because the bud sparkles.

As far as I can tell, Emerald Evolution only has an Instagram (that of which I had a difficult time finding using a Google search) and a Facebook page (which was completely non-existent on Google). This producer lives significantly off the grid. It’s admirable, to an extent; to just have an Instagram that says “ask your local retailer for us by name”. But what if my local retailer doesn’t carry the product? I’d imagine E² are (perhaps) in the process of creating a website right now, in this day and age it’s hard to wonder why it’s not already there.

If the folks of E² are reading this, please invest in some Search Engine Optimization. I absolutely love your product, but it’d be nice to see an online presence. You can even use this seo checklist to start you off if you need it! Utilizing seo will make user experience so much more pleasant and you’ll probably even make some more sales too! It’s definitely worth it if you want to ve visible online as well as competitive with other suppliers. Enough of that, though – let’s get to the important stuff that truly is E²’s craft: the weed itself.

Movin’ right along to the Specifics:

CBG Total: 3.00% CBD Active: 0.23% THC D9 – Active Total: 30.1% Total Cannabinoid: 37.1%

Active Total: 33.1%

Strain: Head Cheese
Species: Hybrid (sative dominant)
Date Harvested: 12/19/15
Date Packaged: 02/12/16
Smell: Licorice + Peppermint + Gasoline
Taste: Berry + Hay + Bitter Hop Flavor
Launch Point: Right away.
High: Stupefying + Carefree + Creative + Blissful

As stated in the opening paragraph, Head Cheese was one of seven strains chosen for the first recreational cannabis cup of Seattle. There were nearly 200 budtenders surveyed, and E²’s crowning bud was heralded by a majority of them.

The buds are a work of art. Glistening in the light, Head Cheese has a neon green with electric orange hairs. Covered in kief, this bud looks as good as it smells, as good as it tastes, as good as it feels. Dense, yet easily crumbled in the hands.

Speaking of fragrance, this weed has a serious stank. Notes of licorice and peppermint, except drenched in gasoline. Yeah, Head Cheese is on fire (or primed to be lighted, if you will – cue the double entendre drum roll). The taste is a bit subdued compared to the overwhelming smell, but maintains a piney-mint like berry flavor.

When you take a hit of Head Cheese, it’s kind of like a rollercoaster in the moment before the drop. A flash of spark and flame, holding the hit in, slowly lurching towards the horizon, a moment of weightlessness and finished by a rapid descent into consensual chaos.

The sativa cerebral dominance is highly present, but there is a groovy body high on top that balances the whole thing out. Be mindful of smoking too much, this is an herb best consumed in proportioned amounts. In terms of getting tired, burnout is only present with heavy usage. A little nip of Head Cheese isn’t going to make you pass out midday. A happy balance lies in moderation.

There is a reason why this strain was part of the Seattle 2015 cannabis cup winners, it’s a heavy hitter – even for the “every day smoker”. I’m going to use this herb for special occasions, certain times when it’s necessary to get outlandishly high. Thanks to E² for simplifying relativity,

You can (as far as we know) find Emerald Evolution’s Head Cheese at Uncle Ikes in Capital Hill, and The Novel Tree in Bellevue. You could always ask your local retailer for them by name, too.

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